Awkward. Revelations and Truths

I've always had an over active imagination........

Not in the "OH MY GOD!!!! LSD was slipped into my veins while I lay there helpless in my mother's womb" usual way

But in a way that would make you scream, at the top of your voice and in one breath for dramatic flare

* cue ermahgerd girl meme *

 "HOLY CRAB CAKE!!! Are those all the thoughts in your head constantly working out different scenarios in which every step you take, could take you and inevitably making your serotonin levels drop considerably"

*looks out for an unmarked ambulance, destination : unknown asylum*

But the total misery beauty of youth is that you're always so blinded with the thoughts of being alone and unique that when you realise that there's bound to be someone out there, just like you, you end up wishing you came to this realisation before you ended up wasting all those tears and nights, wondering why your mind is so clouded with all these voices, forever impairing my judgement...

*looks out window again*

They aren't here yet, I'll be fast

Anyway,

They be asking me questions like:

Do you love this shit?

Are you high right now?

WAIT! 

Drake, stop messing with my flow

Basically questions on every little thing

It never stops

Then I started watching an MTV series a while back,

Awkward.

Which looks into the life of Jenna Hamilton

From her point of view

Through her thoughts

And I LOVED IT!!!!!!

It's not the first time I've related to the cast of a show

or maybe just one

But this time it wasn't because of one quality

or the similarities in struggles

It was on a whole

She reminded me of myself:

Down to earth

Chilled

Focused but still troubled

Never really fitting in her own skin

Surrounded by awesome friends

Use of new age lingo with self coined words
Constantly trying to figure it all out

So I watched it like it was my religion

Watching episodes
Over and Over
And Over Again

Which ended up meaning I knew certain conversation to heart

*Addicted*

The second season is almost over
:(

But this weeks episode really hit me

She was going on and on about how she could have done things differently
With the two guys she loved
Trying to undo her wrongs
Which all ended in failures
Failures mainly because she wasn't happy

And ended up realising that the route we take most often than not, is the best route and that they make us who we are
and I love the person I am

So why would I want to change the good and bad things that irrevocably made me the person I am today?

Makes you think that there's probably someone out there making all this possible

That in the schemes of  things

There's someone watching over us?

Well, 

Maybe?

Maybe not?

This journey isn't over

So all we can is LIVE!!!!!!

*hears doors slam outside and runs away, into the blackened fog*

|I'm Not Alone - Calvin Harris