Progress: My life in Brief

It's been a week since my last post.... Gosh! Sounds like I'm in a confessional.... and It's going well... I decided to stop dating and just give up on relationships for the time being seeing as my life is filled with so much activity already.... I've got pressure coming from all sides, feel like an egg cracked under water leaving it all spherical and isht..... Science references?? Really?? Maybe you should date.. :P Aaaah! Ladies and Gents, I'd like to welcome you to a new commentator. Actually, he's pretty old and has always been present in my past posts mostly camouflaged as confusion. It's my inner voice.... I decided to include it my posts since he's pretty influential and mostly because Grey's Anatomy used that technique in this week's episode... I have to admit that it's more revealing than the usual commentary..... It's not looking at the present from the perspective of the future but in real time.... So this way, you get read what I'm thinking as I type it all up... Now they think you're crazy... Good Work Psychedelly... 

Anyway, back to the matter at hand....

Progress.....

of exes and labels

The fly is dead…

Found it on my window sill today...

I bet he came to say goodbye… J

Kinda feel like he deserves a burial

Shit! Is it even male?

*attempts to find out gender*

HEEEEEEEEEY!! I wasn’t looking for boy bits.

Perv!

My best friend ranted about his ex today

Sorta wish he’d give that up and move on

Don’t know where to but anywhere is better than where he is right now

But I’m sure he will soon

Vixan broke up with me today

I know what ya’ll are thinking

That hypocrite,

How dare he hate on his friend for lingering on 'the ex' and tell us he broke up with his ex again?

Well, it’s not that simple

She didn’t like the ambiguity of our current relationship

Nah! ‘Status’ sounds much better

…… current status

I wasn’t leading her on

I promise

We were just having a great time

We both broke up with the people we were dating and started hanging out again

We were exes

We were allowed

It was fun

Now she had to try and define what we have

Made it more complicated

Made it more of an issue

Made it more of a thing

With mass and everything

I don’t like labels

Life’s got too many grey areas to categorize

She had a problem

I tried to fix it

Asked her what she wanted

Boom!

She said she wanted us to have boundaries

“Have any in mind”, I asked

“Nope, you feel hungry? We should split a serving of chips”, she replied.

She got all ‘dark cloud’ and I was my usual positive self

I’m sorry when I get uncomfortable I tend to laugh a lot

And when she gets this way I don’t know what to do

So I just try to lighten the mood

It’s how I deal with things

Didn’t work

Don’t know how she’s doing

Can’t call because I’ll seem too nice

I like her

Too bad it can’t work out

The fly is dead.

It could be a sign.

Hope is lost.

Guess we’ll just be friends now.

Wasn’t that what we were to begin with?

I'm perplexed.

See why I hate labels?

They just confuse you.

|Fix You- Coldplay

after all the dust has settled

How has life been the past couple of weeks?

One word,

Simple.

A bit too simple.

It's had it's ups and downs.

Ins and outs.

I'll explain that in a minute.

And generally I've felt less of myself that I did when I was in a relationship.

I find it harder to smile.

I still laugh

Oddly more than I did before.

Could it mean I'm happier

Lighter

Easily taken away by hysteria

Masking my emotions

Am I masking my emotions?

I am..

Relationships suck when they end.
You work so hard to be with someone,
Working towards the same goal,
Then in one second it's gone,
The plans,
The dreams,
All gone......
For the best usually,
It was for the best....
Sometimes not towards the goal you were hoping for,
Side lined.
Confused.
Distraught.
Lost.
That's when you have to abandon ship I guess...
When you loose yourself...
So the dust has settled...
I'm at peace I guess...
Better off, they say...

I feel like crap really...
Used and discarded.
Not really used, more like salvaged from the mangling jaws of junk yard,
Guess it's time to dust myself off and move on.
Easier said than done really...
But needed all the less..
Here goes nothing...

*takes first step*